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The Housewife Awards
How's Jen
MommaBlog
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Return to main Housewife Awards page
Check out our 2007-2009 archives.
Our 2010 winners are:
Jeannie Gardiner - 2/15/2010
Jaimee Star - 2/1/2010
Christine Adler - 1/18/2010
Alana Peterson - 1/4/2010
Jeannie Gardiner of Dayville, Connecticut
Warning: School buses ahead.
Jeannie is our latest winner of the Housewife Awards® because of her Back-Seat BUStle.
One day, Jeannie tried to cram too much into the day. First she and her 13-month-old went to a play date, followed by a visit to her
office and the girls at the bank.
It was a full morning and early afternoon for her toddler, whose naptime started sometime in the middle of all that. So, Jeannie
got her little guy settled in the car, offered him a blankie and a binkie (even though, she says, "I'm trying to pull the plug")
and made sure he was snuggled with a neck pillow so he could nap comfortably on the 35-minute car ride home.
As she exited the bank parking lot she could hear him moving erratically in the back seat. Startled, she
stopped the car, turned around and found him flailing his arms and legs and shaking his head. Jeannie's heart sunk.
She thought something was terribly wrong with her toddler.
She yelled to him, "What's wrong, baby?!" But she couldn't see the expression on his face behind that big ole binkie.
As she frantically tugged at her seatbelt to try to unlatch it, she noticed a school bus on the road,
waiting at the red light. She admits: "What I thought was a medical emergency in the back seat was simply school bus excitement!"
Her toddler, it seems, is a huge fan of school buses. To him, it was like siting Elvis.
"I can only hope he'll have this same excitement for the big yellow bus in high school," says Jeannie. Good luck with that one, Jeanne.
You're a good mom, Jeannie! a copy of HappyBaby: The Organic Guide to Baby's First 24 Months
by the founders of HappyBaby, plus a bonus copy of Jen Singer's "Stop Second-Guessing Yourself -- The Toddler Years,"
and a Housewife Award® certificate for the fridge.
Jaimee Star of Tremont City, Ohio
Jaimee is hiding her lollipops.
Jaimee is our latest winner of the Housewife Awards® because of her Sane Shopping Trip, Sucka!
Jaimee just wanted to buy dinner and go home. But her three-year-old was being particularly fussy that day, so she had to resort to every mom's dirty little secret:
She handed him a bag of lollipops. Only, he didn't just choose one and eat it contentedly in his car seat en route to the supermarket. Rather, he unwrapped one, licked it
and put it in his lap. Then he unwrapped another one, licked it and put it in his lap. Again, and again and again.
Jaimee did not care. It was that kind of day. She admits, "I felt it was a small sacrifice to make."
When they got to the supermarket, Jaimee pulled her son out of his car seat and began tossing the barely licked, yet sticky, lollipops in the trash can by the cart corral.
She picked out a kid-sized cart for her son to keep him busy so she could buy what she needed fast and get back home.
As soon as they walked into the store, Jaimee felt people looking at them. She figured they would comment on how adorable her son was or about
how determined he was as he sped down the aisles.
But two younger guys looked at them, and began laughing hysterically.
Jaimee wondered if her son was picking his nose or if her fly was undone.
When she got to the van, she figured out what was so stinking funny. As she shut the door,
she saw her reflection in the window. Turns out, she had several Dum-Dum lollipops stuck to her armpits and her chest.
Two red, one green and one of those "funky white coconut or pina colada,
sticking around as though I had intended to finish them later," remembers Jaimee.
She yanked them off and had a good chuckle as she tossed them into the trash --
just as the two amused guys yelled out their window while they drove by, "See ya, Sucka!"
She says: "The best part? Still feeling it was all worth it because my son was so content and calm and cool ... worth any price in humiliation!"
You're a good mom, Jaimee! You win a copy
of a copy of Kristen Chase's The Mominatrix's Guide to Sex: A No-Surrender Advice Book for Naughty Moms
plus a Housewife Award® certificate for the fridge.
Christine Adler of Somers, New York
Christine is getting ready to deal Crazy Eights.
Christine is our latest winner of the Housewife Awards® because of her Just Say No to Homework in the Waiting Room.
When Christine took her two sons for their physical exams one Tuesday right after school, the pediatrician recommended an
EKG for her fifth grader, who had been having chest pains during gym class.
Concerned, Christine took her 10-year-old to the radiology center right away.
While she waited for the appointment, she played cards with both of her sons in the waiting room for about 20 minutes.
By the time they finished the EKG, it was late. They went home, ate dinner, took showers and went off to bed.
The next day, Christine wrote a note to her son's teacher, asking her to give him an extra day on his homework, given the unexpected EKG and all.
But the teacher wrote back asking why he couldn't have done his homework in the car or the waiting room.
She said that he'd need to keep up or he'd be ejected from the advanced class. Though she did excuse him from his homework,
Christine says "for about 10 seconds I was kicking myself for not making him do the work in the doctor's office.
Then I decided that the teacher was INSANE, and that playing Crazy Eights with my son was far better before a scary test
than making him do homework. Harvard be damned! And if that makes me a bad mother, I don't care!"
Turns out, the chest pains were caused by stress. Go figure.
You're a good mom, Christine! You win a copy
of of Leah Ingram's Suddenly Frugal: How to Live Happier and Healthier for Less,
plus a Housewife Award® certificate for the fridge.
Alana Peterson of Monroeville, New Jersey
Alana has kicked off her shoes.
Alana is our latest winner of the Housewife Awards® because of her High-Topped Christmas party.
Here's Alana's story, in her own words:
"I managed to rush and get dressed in a beautiful red velvet jacket with matching taffeta and velvet striped,
long skirt in prep for my husband's Christmas party, postponed from a week prior due to a massive Nor'easter.
Threw on my Chuck Taylor High Tops, because I couldn't find my boots... grabbed my dress shoes and off
I went.
"Got to the kids' postponed Christmas program at church in time to help coordinate the line-ups.
The girliest little girl dressing in a foo-foo holiday creation told me she had to go potty and off we went...
I held her aloft the potty because we were NOT to crinkle the 'crinkle-ing' in her dress. Got her cleaned up, running down the center isle,
only to hear my little boys' friend say, 'Your mom's cool. She's wearing CT's with her outfit, there's a turd on her shoe,
and, she doesn't even care.'
"That's right. I grabbed a tissue, plucked the offending turd and wore said CT's to the Christmas Party
instead of the dress shoes."
You're a good mom, Alana! You win a copy
 
of Tracy Beckerman's Rebel without a Minivan and Beth Feldman's See Mom Run: Sidesplitting Essays by the World's Most Harried Blogging Moms -- with an essay by MommaSaid's Jen Singer --
plus a Housewife Award® certificate for the fridge.
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